Some people really get it, some people don’t. “It” being the meaning of life and what is truly meaningful, valuable, and important. My husband and I will be the first to tell you that sometimes we fail to make that phone call or set up that dinner date with friends, we struggle to keep work and social life balance (typically we do more work than is good for us), and we struggle to reach out to new groups of people. Even with all of that being said, we try really hard to not let important things slide. The important things being: people, relationships, and showing love and support always, but especially reaching out in times of need.
After the accident, one of my husband’s friends dropped off an entire dish of homemade lasagna. It was delicious and to be honest with you, it tasted even more amazing because someone cared enough to bring it to our front door. That’s one of those “get it” moments.
Two days after the accident, another one of husband’s friends dropped off an angel figurine in our mailbox. It was beautiful and I took it with me on our week long trip down south. Another “get it” moment.
The day after the accident my parents drove 2 hours just to be with us for the whole day and help us out. They brought lunch, gave me hugs, drove down another 2 hours just to get all of my personal items out of my car. Amazing. Simply amazing.
The week after the accident, my husband received many phone calls from work and friends and I received quite few messages myself. I received big hugs from people, inquisitive and concerned faces, and loving words like, “I’m so glad you’re alive.” or “I”m so glad you are okay, that must have been really scary.”
Those moments, those gifts, those words meant and continue to mean more than I can explain. They are a true and clear message of hope and comfort to me in my time of healing. All I keep thinking is that they were doing exactly what James Taylor said to do,”Better to shower the people you love with love, show them the way that you feel. Things will be much better if you only will…”
After the accident, everything seems enhanced. I’m walking around my old life, but there are things I’m noticing things that I didn’t before and experiencing life at a heightened state. Like how it feels to have my husband hold my hand as I lay in the hospital bed. I took it for granted for so many years and suddenly it felt like the first time I had ever done it. Also, today as I drove home, I saw a group of 60 year old women in the car behind me laughing and having a good time. I smiled and started to get weepy. How awesome is it that they’ve been through the majority of their lives, experienced so many things, and they are still out sharing stories and spending time together on a Saturday afternoon? That’s what it is about! Getting together, sharing, and connecting with each other.
Sometimes there are people that don’t get it. Sometimes they don’t even realize it. I don’t blame them really. Most of the time it is a result of not having been through something like this, not ever imagining what it is like, and now knowing what to do to help. I can only hope that if you find yourself in situation where someone close to you has something happen like this, call them. Don’t wait for them to send you a message. Send a card. (It means more than you think.) Show up with dinner. (It doesn’t need to be prepared.) Bring a small gift, flowers, or food to their doorstep. Acknowledge the situation, don’t ignore it or make it taboo. Shower them in love. Be a person that “gets it.”