The Ice Pack.

I hit my head on my car today as I turned to look behind me. I was pulling out of the driveway, I whipped my head around too fast, and just like that, I hit my forehead right where the curtain airbag is located. It reminded me of the bump I had on my head after the accident. It was on the right side or maybe the left side and I remember it throbbing. (It’s funny how your brain forgets details like that.)

The worst thing was…I was terrified and I couldn’t figure out what caused the injury. Did I hit it on the side of the car door? Was it from the curtain airbag bursting open or the windowpane? Was it the side of the truck as the force of it and height of it as it went through my window?

However I got it, I knew it wasn’t good. I tried to look at it in the mirror right after the accident and could tell that if I didn’t get ice on it, it was going to be a big fat egg. Somehow I remembered that I had a first aid kit  in the glovebox.  For whatever reason, it had an icepack in it. I was thrilled! I usually have such a hard time breaking them, but I don’t even remember it being a problem. In those moments, as I spoke on the phone with 911, I just remember it’s cool touch being one of the most soothing feelings. I couldn’t solve what had just happened, but I could take care of this one small part of my body and make it feel like it was going to be okay.

That was a huge relief given that my brain could not handle what was happening. I was in shock. I was eerily calm yet the 911 dispatcher was telling me I was talking too fast, I was shaking uncontrollably throughout my journey in the ambulance and hospital. I was shivering and having difficulty getting through answers without tears pouring down the sides of my cheeks into the neck brace that was fastened around me.

That ice pack. That tiny little ice pack gave me a moment of control and calm during such a terrible night.

I’ve been trying to think of what to do next March the 25th. It’ll be a Friday and I know I’ll hate part of that day. It’s hard to say I’ll hate all of it since it was the day I lived.  I think maybe what I’ll do is give away first aid kits with tiny little ice packs to all of my close friends and family. I can’t protect them, try as I might, but I can at least give them something to help if they ever meet their match on the road like I did.

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